He hears a strange sound
He follows it and stops
In front of him is a quiet tombstone
He takes a deep breath and touches the cold stone
Suddenly, he let go the stone and starts crying
The stone is quiet, as nothing has happened
He hears a girl's voice saying "He killed me!"
He is shock and scared
He wants the others understanding what is happening
But nobody can
He feels he is a paper sack filled with sadness and fear
He feels bad for the death of the girl
He feels sad for his loneliness of his life
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I love the cold of the stone, but what does the "strange sound" sound like?
ReplyDeleteI like how you have your subject in stanza two feeling bad for himself and his victim. Complex emotions.
I think this was great. It made you think about how a person can feel about the loss of another person and the loneliness that fills their life after a loss. It definitely makes you imagine whats going on and the different sensory images and feelings.
ReplyDeleteI can really visualize what is happening. Your poem gives a mood of confusion for the character. I really like how you expressed the character's feelings.
ReplyDeleteI thought this poem was really good. It made me want to read more because of the mysterious tone of the poem. After reading this I had a lot of questions but that's what I liked most about it.
ReplyDelete"The stone was quiet, as nothing has happened" I just feel thats a powerful line because it has so much more meaning to it. Also the last part of the poem how you say he feels bad for the girl who died but then he felt bad for himself. I thought that was very interesting
ReplyDeleteThe repetition at the end of the poem (He feels...) really adds interest to the poem. Overall, you create a great sense of the loneliness the character is experiencing.
ReplyDeletethis poem was really good. It was kind of mysterious and and made me want to know what happened in the book.
ReplyDelete